THE BEST RUM CAKE EVER
1 or 2 quarts of Rum
1 c butter
1 tsp. sugar
2 large eggs
1 c dried fruit
1 tsp. soda
Before you start, sample the Rum to check for quality. Good isn't it?
Now go ahead and select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the Rum
again... it must be just right. To be sure the Rum is of the highest quality,
pour one level cup of Rum into glass and drink it as fast as you can. REPEAT.
With an electric mixer beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 seaspoon of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile make sure the Rum is of
the finest quality, try another cup. Open second quart if necessary.
Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried druit and beat til high, if the druit
gets stuck in beaters, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample Rum again,
checking for tonscisticity.
Next, sift 2 cups of pepper or salt (it really doesn't matter). Sample
Rum again. Sift 1/2 pint of lemon juice, fold in chopped butter and strained
nuts. Add one babblespoon of brown thugar or what ever color you can find and
Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 gredees. Now pour the whole mess
onto the coven and ake. Check the Rum again and bo to bed.